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Aging Humorously

Serenity Funeral Home of Southern Utah • September 28, 2021

Getting older isn’t what it used to be. Fifty is the new thirty, and people that choose to take care of themselves seem to live longer and better lives. That being said, there is still a fair amount of trauma and stress involved in the aging process. I am a triathlete and have been competing for many years. Even though I still enjoy training, the process isn’t getting easier as I age. I have photos from races in which I am younger, and I’m smiling while I’m running. I don’t smile as much as I used to. My mind tells me to go faster, and my body responds with a resolute, “No!”

I couldn’t help but chuckle when I read John Blumenthal’s article for the HuffPost entitled “35 Classic One-liners About Aging.” Here is a selection of my favorites:

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. – Will Rogers

The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again. – Erma Bombeck

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred. – Woody Allen

I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes. – Andy Rooney

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. – Agatha Christie

At my age, flowers scare me. – George Burns

He’s so old that when he orders a three-minute egg, they ask for the money up front. – George Burns

Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning. – Bob Hope

You know you’re getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It’s like, “See if you can blow this out.” – Jerry Seinfeld

Yes, time moves on for all of us, but keeping a sense of humor about the process makes it much easier to bear. If you are interested in preplanning your final wishes, please call or stop by our office to obtain a free copy of a memorial planning guide. Serenity Funeral Home is located just off Riverside Drive at 1316 S. 400 E., St. George, UT, (435) 986-2085.

Submitted by Larry L. Hansen, Licensed Funeral Director/Owner

Photo by Adobe Stock

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