How to Help a Grieving Friend

We don’t always know exactly what to say or do when a friend or family member loses a loved one. We may be fearful of intruding, saying the wrong thing, or somehow worsening the situation. It is important to remember, however, that while we can’t take away their pain, we can provide a measure of comfort and support.

Simply listen . Take the time to sit down with a grieving friend and ask about their deceased loved one. Let them cry, if needed. The bereaved should feel free to express their feelings without fear of judgment, argument, or criticism.

Be willing to sit in silence . Those in mourning may sometimes find it too difficult to speak. Simply offer comfort and support with your silent presence, eye contact, a squeeze of the hand, or a reassuring hug.

Ask how you can help . Be willing to take over as many simple duties as possible. Even small tasks can add stress to a grieving person’s day. Be willing to take initiative – many people have difficulty accepting help when it’s offered.

Mention the deceased’s name . Grieving people need to feel like their loved one has not been forgotten, and mentioning their name in conversation facilitates the healing process.

Take the time to call . Text or call the person often to see how they are coping. Do not be afraid to follow-up a few days after the death or funeral. Let them know you will make time to talk when needed.

There is no right or wrong way to grieve. We must allow others the time they need to process their emotions and remember that grief follows its own trajectory.

Submitted by Russ Atkin, Owner/Licensed Funeral Director

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